Interview – Dr Brian Rzepczynki

Would you like to share your name?

My name is Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, DHS, MSW

What prompted you to become involved in a love, relationship or sex related field?

I’d been working as a therapist/counselor since 1992 (I’ve always had a strong desire to help people with personal development and enrichment), and many of my clients presented with relationship and sexuality issues. To be able to better understand and treat these issues, I pursued further education to expand my clinical skills and repertoire to be able to better serve my clients rather than referring them out to other specialists.

What is your title?

I am a Gay Dating, Relationship, & Sex Coach

In a few sentences, how do you describe what you do?

I specialize in providing individual and couples coaching to gay men (I work with all genders and sexual orientations too!) to help them maximize their success in dating, relationships, and sexual intimacy. I also offer classes, workshops, and programs over a variety of topics related to relationships and sexuality and services are conducted over the telephone or in-person on an international basis.

What sort of education, background, experience etc do you have for this work?

I have a master’s degree in clinical social work and a doctorate degree in human sexuality. I also have additional certifications in life coaching, relationship coaching, sex education and clinical sexology, and other various mental health certifications in such things as anger management and grief recovery.

What sort of additional training did you feel you needed to do more for your clients?

I’m an education fanatic. I’m always trying to keep myself current and to keep my brain stimulated by taking various classes and certifications to better serve my clients. I love to learn and would rather read a clinical or self-help book than a fictional novel for fun.

How long have you worked in this industry?

18 years as a therapist and 7 years as a coach

If you have a main focus or niche – what is it?

I work predominantly with gay men on dating, relationship, and sex issues, but work with all genders and sexual orientations.

What lead you to that specialty?

As a gay man, I felt that there was a lack of resources available for the gay community on how to have healthy relationships and sexuality. To fill that void, I pursued additional studies and built a secondary business to my therapy practice that focuses exclusively on teaching the GLBT community (predominantly gay men) skills and strategies for improving their success in their dating lives, relationships, and sexuality. My coaching business, The Gay Love Coach, was born in 2003 to meet this need.

What has been the hardest thing about your work?

The most challenging and sometimes painful part of my work is having to deal with homophobia. I frequently receive hate mail, false subscriptions to my mailing list from people who think it’s funny to sign up someone they know to a “gay site”, and on occasion have even received letters with veiled death threats and statements of a violent and abusive nature for the work that I do. Over time, I’ve learned to accept this as being par for the course and that my mission and those that I am able to successfully reach and positively impact is far more important than dealing with ignorance and prejudice. Homophobia is an unfortunate consequence of what I do, but my passion for spreading my message about affirmative gay relationships helps to buffer that and actually helps to motivate me to keep fighting even harder.

What has been the most rewarding thing about your work?

Being one of the pioneers in love coaching specifically for gay men when coaching starting to become more of a presence, it’s been highly rewarding to be able to make a difference in the lives of gay men and to help them recognize that gay relationships DO count and DO last. Witnessing the success of my clients is what makes it all worth it!

Tell us about your business.

I offer individual and couples telephonic and in-person coaching. I also conduct workshops, classes, and programs related to gay dating, relationships, and sexuality. I have a blog and an advice column and have written a multitude of practical self-help articles for the gay community on these issues that have become viral all over the Web and has aided in my being contacted by various media for interviews.

How long have you been in business?

18 years total

Did you expand an existing business?

Personal Victory Counseling, Inc. is the name of my private therapy practice, which serves all ages (children, adolescents, and adults) and populations. It was established in 1999 and I expanded the practice to include my coaching business, The Gay Love Coach: Man 4 Man Coaching Services in 2003.

Do you have a website and/or blog?

Yes. It is

How could someone get in touch with you?

My e-mail address is and my phone number is (630) 375-7416.

Who are your favorite types of client?

While my specialty is coaching gay men, I work with all genders and sexual orientations who are motivated and who desire to build a lasting and satisfying intimate relationship.

Would you like to share your most unusual experience?

The most unsuspecting outgrowth of my coaching practice has been the frequent contacts I receive from the media for interviews. I’ve been interviewed and/or quoted by The Chicago Tribune,, and Esquire Magazine. I was interviewed by a singles radio program on gay dating and was even approached and signed by a media production company to be the resident sex coach for a reality TV show that was being produced (unfortunately the project was dropped due to lack of financing). I’d never imagined reaching these heights when I first started, so it’s been a very enjoyable secondary benefit to the business.

How do you promote your business?

A lot of it is now word-of-mouth, but I also do a lot of marketing through writing articles and distributing them to various article directory sites, publishing a monthly newsletter, promotion through social media platforms, and occasional advertisements in event pamphlets.

Have you written any books or developed any products for your clients?

I am co-author of the 2005 self-help book “A Guide to Getting It: Purpose & Passion” in which I wrote a chapter about how to develop “zest for life.” I am currently in the midst of developing some products for my site and have plans to write my own book.

If so, definitely share some details and links for more information.

A Guide to Getting It: Purpose & Passion

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