It may be surprising what a damper children can be on your love life. The first year after a baby is born many women struggle with exhaustion, fluctuating hormones and the overwhelming adjustment that a child places on your life. Often they struggle to get in the mood or stay in the mood during this time period. And their husbands struggle to be supportive, still wanting to have a satisfying sex life while juggling a family. It should get easier as the children get older, but it doesn’t always. It is important to take time now to revamp your love life so that your family has a better shot at staying together. A sexless marriage is all work and no fun!
Schedule Regular Dates
It is important to hire a babysitter on a regular basis, once a week or twice a month, to allow the two of you to reconnect emotionally. Take advantage of your dates to spend real time together talking and connecting the way you did before kids entered your relationship. If you start this when you are young, it will be easier to carry it forward in the future. Connecting emotionally will help you when you contact physically later as well. It is difficult to have a fulfilling sex life when you are not connecting on all levels of your relationship.
Take Weekends Away Together
Schedule vacations that do not involve the children. This can be a short weekend trip where you drop the kids off at the grandparents, or weeklong trips to paradise where you hire a sitter to cover for you. No matter if you do it in short bursts or longer stays, it should be a regular part of your life. Even if you cannot afford to go on a fancy vacation, sending the kids away for the weekend and having the house to yourself for a few days can make a big difference in allowing yourself to connect with each other again. It is important to try to do this each year.
Schedule Sex and Stick to Your Schedule
One of the best ways to make sure you are having sex on a regular basis is to schedule it. You need to follow through with your plan, and it may mean a few quickies on bad days, but it can help jumpstart a tired libido to have sex on a regular basis. You can take the thirty-day challenge, which means you have sex every day for thirty days. Many women who struggle with wanting sex find that this helps them rekindle their desire and at the end of the challenge they may not have sex every single day, but they do a lot more often than they did before the challenge.
Try Something New
Sometimes you just need to be willing to try something new. This may mean acting out a fantasy for your partner, playing a game, or trying a new position. There are games, and books available to help you figure out new things to try if you have gotten into sex slump and need ideas. If you are embarrassed to purchase them at the store, take advantage of online stores. It can make your love life more exciting if you know you are trying something new.
About the Author:
Heather Green is a freelance writer for several regional magazines in North Carolina as well as a resident blogger for www.onlinenursingdegrees.org. Her writing experience includes fashion, business, health, agriculture and a wide range of other topics. Heather has just completed research on nursing programs online and online nursing school.